feedback: tlynnfic [at] gmail.com
Title: Fish Have Feelings, Too
Category: V, A, MSR
Keywords: MSR, Scully’s POV
Archive: Sure, but if it’s not auto-archive, just let me know.
Feedback: Always appreciated, good or bad.
Author’s notes: This started out as another 155-word piece, but, obviously, didn’t end up as such. Brevity has never been one of my stronger qualities. No betas on this one, either, so any mistakes are all my own. Thanks to all those at IWTB…
* * * *
It didn’t hit me until he brought over the fish tank. I watched him from across the room, struggling with the half-empty aquarium, taking great care to keep it as steady as possible. They looked a little sluggish – perhaps it was just some slight shock at being moved to a new environment. Or perhaps even they knew something was changing. Either way, I must have had an indignant look on my face despite my efforts to remain neutral.
“You’re going to watch them for me, aren’t you?” he asked, looking up at me then.
“Yeah,” I responded, then turned away quickly and headed over to my bedroom to check on William.
Our son was sleeping peacefully in his bassinet, his tiny hands in loose fists and his perfect little mouth puckered slightly. The room was so quiet I could hear his steady, even breathing and I backed up a few steps to sit down on the bed, content for the moment to simply listen to this still-new and beautiful sound.
That’s when the emotions flooded me.
And I did the only thing I could manage for the time being – I held my head in my hands and cried.
I jumped as his voice carried from the doorway to my ears and quickly wiped the tears from my eyes. It was silly to do such, of course. If my red eyes didn’t give away that I had been crying, his uncanny ability to read me would.
I felt him walk over, slow and unsure and I could almost see the worry in his furrowed eyebrows without turning around. He went over to Will first, peeking in with a small smile, then sat down next to me.
“Scully, I -” he began, resting his hand on my arm, but I jumped at his touch and added several inches of distance between us.
He looked at me and I could see the hurt and confusion in his eyes.
“Look, Mulder, I’m sorry,” I said as I stood up, shaking it off. “I just can ‘t do this right now.”
“Just say the word,” he said matter-of-factly. “Say the word and I won’t go.”
I shook my head and smiled slightly – if only it were that simple. I went over to him, still sitting, and parted his legs with my body. I stood there in front of him and his hands went to my waist, holding it tightly as I moved my hands to hold his beautiful face.
“Part of me wants to take in as much of you as I can,” I told him, my hands caressing his cheeks. “And part of me wants you to leave as soon as possible.”
His eyes questioned me and I smiled and leaned down to kiss him softly on the lips.
“Because the sooner you go,” I continued. “The sooner I won’t be able to touch another part of you and miss you that much more.”
He nodded and pulled my body closer in an embrace and I reveled in the sensation of his face buried in my stomach. I wrapped my arms around his neck and laid my head on his, memorizing the softness of his skin
and the clean smell of his hair.
“I love you, Scully,” me mumbled into me, squeezing a little tighter.
“I know, Mulder,” I told him sadly. “And that’s why you need to go.”